Friday, March 22, 2013

The Hawk, The Crow... and the Dove

It was a morning to lay still.
Yesterday's weight had not kept me from sleep ---- but my waking moments held me paralyzed. Can i do this Lord? This call, this work, Lord are you sure it is possible for little me to carry Great You into grimy places.
So my angst was countered by prayers --- and i lay there in the flow witnessing the Lord roll waves of Truth over stoney shores.
Walking barefoot on sandy shores is a pure pleasure --- walking barefoot on stoney shores is painful.
But when watery waves beat long and hard on stones --- they dissolve into sand.
So it was for me as i lay still ---- waking to the remembrance of yesterday's hurts and struggles --- trying to navigate into the new day given me.  His plans washing away mine.

His plans are better ---- always.

So before it would be safe for my feet to hit the floor --- Prayers rolled --- laced with scripture pages held in my heart ---
"You Lord are my Shepherd, and because of You i shall NOT be in want. You make me lie down in green pastures, as i lay here in this soft, safe bed, i feel your green pastures, grateful. You lead me beside still waters -- the world would lead me to rapids, but not You. And then here it comes --- YOU RESTORE MY SOUL. You know my soul needs to be restored - daily. Not by hiding, not by denying, i will not be restored by sedating or running ---- i will be restored by You. You know there are valleys with shadows that whisper of the loneliness and tremblings of death, and You know when we walk through those valleys. Those around us might not know, but You, You do. And you don't leave us alone. You are with us in the valley of the shadow of death. Evil is near sometimes --- but you are with us. So God, i will fear no evil, You are near. Your rod, your staff --- they comfort me. They use to feel uncomfortable on my back. But now, i long to feel them. They guide me carefully to the places you know are best. I trust your rod and your staff --- I trust your guidance, your corrections. You remind me to stay on your paths, elsewhere there are enemies who would devour me. You prepare a table for me, you will feed me, you will fill my cup to overflowing, you will hold my head in your mighty hands and breath your anointing on my tininess. And though i am still here, in this world, i'm not "home" with you yet Lord --- you will bring your "home" to me and allow your goodness and mercy to be near me until i finally breathe my last ---- and come Home.

Thank you for your promises and comfort.

Thank you for never growing weary of weakness.

Thank you for touching my weakness with your strength, my lack with your abundance, my fear with your faith, my questions with your answers, my wanderings with your Home........ deep within... You are Home.

Spent of words,  remembering His presence and provision, i rose from the safe place He had given me to rest, i rose from the "green pasture" and walked to the window. A morning routine, i pulled back the drawn curtains and drank in the look of the early morning sky. Our bedroom windows frame long views of tree filled woods with mountains beyond. On this morning, the wintry, leafless trees so tall and naked exposed a great hawk perched high overlooking the field below. Breakfast was surely on his predatory mind. Powerful and clawed, he was impressive and intimidating. A much smaller black crow glided through the treeline nearby; he came to rest in the tree beside the hawk. They were two dark figures in the morning light, both holding whispers --- one of power and death soon to come, the other of squawking irritation and pestering ways. One would kill if given the chance --- the other would cause trouble and dissension.

A picture of this world was encapsulated before me.
God's great mountains and fields and woods --- beautiful to the eye, vast in size.
But perched within them, were troublesome killers and mischief-makers.
Miniscual compared to the Master --- but still ominously present, perched, and prepared to do their ugly deeds.

"Ye though i walk through the valley of the shadow of death --- i will fear NO evil..."

Then a movement in the tree near me, the great old tree that has watched all my children grow up. My eyes shift to find what had moved so near me. And there it was, a tiny morning dove. She was near me, alone, my favorite of all birds --- this plain colored peaceful one, who comforts each morning with her gentle cooing sounds.
Surely she was aware of the great hawk on the other side of the field.
I wanted to go to her, to whisper, "sit very still little one, because just there -- is danger".

Another picture from Heaven for me ---- how often do i feel like the dove in the leaf-barren tree as i navigate through this world.

But just as that thought came full clear --- the little, grey dove flew up high and around the wide field --- and of all the thousands of trees to choose from --- she flew directly to the trees that held the hawk and crow. I cringed.
What could that helpless dove be thinking.
Was it foolish or blind.
A diminutive dot in the hard, cold tree limbs beside the intimidating bulk of the claw carrying killer who feasts on grey winged coo-ers, it appeared as though the little one had served itself up to certain death.
No fog came on the window as i drew near to watch ever so closely --- for my breath held still in  my lungs.

The hawk seemed to twist its head around and glare.
The crow flew away at the hawk's sudden movement.
The dove held perfectly still --- holding her position --- steady.
i was learning from Abba.

Several minutes passed ---- the dove perched just mere feet from claws.

Then she flew -- the minute dove rose up on her wings and flew deeper into the woods. I could see her no more -- she was on her way.
And the one who could have stripped her of her life ---- sat, hungry, alone, ineffective, claws clamped to the cold branch beneath his girth.

"Ye, though i walk through the valley of the shadow of death, i will fear no evil."

The hawk kills. The crow gossips and stirs dissensions. The tiniest of all -- the fragile dove --- it teaches in its gentle, silent, fearless, obedience.

i will not shrink back Lord --

"You prepare a table before me ---- in the presence of my enemies."

... and then, my day began...

©2013 Donna Taylor/Reaching for the Robe


  1. Beautiful as always, Donna. I love your descriptions; I can picture the whole scene in my mind. It's interesting how your favorite bird is the meek and gentle dove, and one of my favorite birds is the hawk, the killer as you say. But I don't often think of that aspect of the hawk. I love the way they glide, seemingly so effortlessly high in the sky with eyes so precise and perfect they can see the tiniest movement below. Their strength and magnificence captivates me and as they dive down for the kill, they are so accurate and swift. I wonder what this says about me?

  2. Dearest Krista - Thank you for your thoughts, i LOVE IT when you comment on my posts! In truth - i too have great admiration for hawks and eagles and owls -- all those great birds of prey. They are so majestic and powerful --they command respect. And who could ever forget "Those who wait upon the Lord will renew their strength, they will mount up with wings like eagles..." :)
    My posting was just written from the perception of the courage, helpless dove, admiring its bravado and gentle presence beside the mighty hawk. And i don't think your admiration of the hawk says anything in particular about you friend :). But if it does, perhaps it speaks of your courage and strength -- both of which come from your Father. You are beautiful!